Oct 21, 2015

I'm not in the mood of making a family. I'm still not happy with my life. There's so much i want to change but still, being a coward i am, i need an escape plan. Plan B to Z.  So many uncertainties make me think too much and do nothing.

I go to work at 6am and return home nearly midnight on daily basis. I wake up every morning and feel like my whole body weighs a thousand pounds. I feel like screaming to every face i meet but instead i fake a smile.

How is it possible to be happy living like that?

Oct 11, 2015

Why do you always start something, and then end it so cruelly?

So cowardly.

Oct 9, 2015

I'm a doctor. A crappy one.

I started working 18 months ago. First day on the job, i had a presyncopal attack, missed my Asar prayer and drived back to my parents home drenched in sweat, tears and fears. It was a hell like no other. I could feel that i'm losing myself bit by bit. The most obvious one is my smile. God, i miss my smiling resting face.

But i'm still a doctor. A crappy one. Is there any reason to stay?